Learning as we go…

Well, I'm on a computer binge roll here. Might as well make the most of it. If I wake up tomorrow with a blackout, I will have these posts to remind me. Oh no...

Spunky writes about Homeschool Snobbery. Spunky has a really interesting and thought provoking blog. Here is what I think. Yes we are snobs. I am a snob. I drink from the Holy Grail of homeschooling.

It is really snobbery, though? The more I think about it and peel away the layers in my mind and heart, I think it has more to do with defenses. I do. I think homeschooling is not yet a comfortable, safe place to be. Why? Because we are constantly defending ourselves to others. Many of us are under government scrutiny (as is the rest of the country when it comes to how we "educate" our children) and that scrutiny and the impending doom of more scrutiny makes one defensive. It is a reaction. The reaction includes the need to criticize the impending doom~public school. Yes. That is one place I do not want my children to go. I do not want public school think  guiding the way I raise my children. I do not want civil servants and public officials telling me to raise my children( educate them) in the way they say I should. I feel this whole heartedly. I ask myself, would I feel so critical if I didn't feel fearful or threatened? I don't think so. I would feel more of a "live and let live" feeling.

Homeschooling is right for me. It is not right for everyone. Public School is not right for my children, but it is right for some children.

Could public school be better? Yes. Does it bother me that public school is becoming more and more standard based and actually leaving the individuality of each individual child behind? Yes. It bothers me alot. I think the fact that I was trained to be a secondary ed teacher, working on a masters in reading instruction before children and wanting so much to "make a difference" in the lives of children makes me feel emotional invested. I still care about the public school system. I want it to change. I probably would not send my children there, though, even if it did change because we like our lifestyle alot. It is right for us and I like choice too much now.

Personal beliefs, personal choices are personal, and I dont have a right to judge what is right for another person. When I feel threatened by your belliefs and your system (be it public education as it is today or environmental practices), I feel stronger in my need to verbalize my thoughts on the matters. I don't want to be a snob. I want to be able to follow my conscience, my mind to do what I think is right for me and my children.

IMO, here is a catch for us homeschoolers: What everyone else senses from us probably affects us in the end in some way or another. Fear and defensiveness do not build bridges. I sure would love to be able to speak my truth without diminishing others. I think referring others to "scriptures" to make up their own minds sounds diminshing. If "scriptures" can speak differently to your heart than mine (or the other Christian, I am not), then I can see saying that.

I also think that the idea that folks feel defensive around homeschoolers because they feel insecure or guilty is not always correct. I think people can feel defensive around defensive people. We create it sometimes. Just like I did in the post below this one.

Another thought on this: Sometimes people are not familiar with openly discussing and disagreeing on topics. That can feel threatening to them. I'm still getting used to it. I'm practicing here.:-)

(The test that I am drafting in is all messed up. Pardon the errors. I literally cannot see them as this font is about sizee 6 and gets squashy when I try to increase it..help?)